There’s a cow named after me in Kenya.
I wrote a short screenplay that was produced by the Upright Citizens Brigade and played in 20,000 theaters across the country.
My photo appeared in a Michael Jackson biography.
When I was eight, I started ROB Magazine, a monthly publication known for its wit, sophistication, and potty jokes.
Mark Hamill liked one of my Tweets.
I’ve written for the Cartoon Network, The Onion, McSweeney’s, and NPR.
I once pitched an ad campaign to Jon Bon Jovi. He bought the idea on the spot.
Pro wrestling legend King Kong Bundy said to me, “you’re a very polite man.”
I was a Disney character where I made the magic happen for an international audience with runny noses and fanny packs.
I’ve sat at Stephen Colbert’s desk.
Auditioned for a part in “Rocky Balboa.” Didn’t get it but I did talk to Frank Stallone. Outside a port-a-potty.
For seven years, I wrote a syndicated humor column that was praised by the esteemed Erma Bombeck Foundation, as well as my parents who hung it on the fridge with magnets shaped like fruit.
I got into this business because I love ideas. Concepting them, writing them, creating them. Plus, I wanted to wear shorts to work.